“I hate my legs”

That was one of the heartbreaking quotes I saw in my text messages this morning.

I slept at home last night because only one parent is allowed to stay overnight. Julia told me early on that she was staying, and I didn’t argue with her. Based on how well he did yesterday, we were optimistic about the night. But, this morning, when she was giving me a summary of their night together, it wasn’t very good news.

I guess the epidural didn’t work as well as they were hoping and he got a little behind on the pain meds once or twice, which wasn’t good for him. His pain got pretty bad at one point, which led to a lot of crying and saying things like he hated his legs, that he wished he’d never came here, and he cried out to God to help him.

Whew… That’s tough. As I type this, and Julia looks over my shoulder, she just said “you weren’t even here for that! You don’t even know!” She’s right. I’ve only seen a little glimpse when they moved him from his bed to a wheelchair, which was quite uncomfortable for him. Just that little bit was hard to watch. Sheesh… This is going to be rough.

But then the pain meds, some new ones, kicked in and man, did he chat up a storm. He wouldn’t stop talking about anything and everything. We needed that. We’re going to need lots of that.

We’re passing the time with games on the iPad, movies on the TV, and lots of visits from the staff checking up on him. Julia’s trying to get some sleep here and there and Elijah’s trying to not fall asleep. (His blood pressure was a bit low last night so they had to come in a check it a lot throughout the night. We’d rather be safe than sorry but it didn’t make for good sleep for anyone.)

So, right now things are ok, and that’s good. He just told me he gets excited every time the door opens because he thinks it might be visitors coming to see him! I’m sure he’ll get those later, but right now it’s just the three of us, taking it real slow.